Chile in our eyes Part 1: Torres Del Paine and Glacier Trekking

The decision to go to Chile was made after many discussions . I have longed to go to Bolivia . However Dan already went there with his friends so that I have to save Bolivia for another trip. In addition to Bolivia, Chile was an alternative. After looking for a ticket for so long, we eventually found tickets that was not super expensive.

 Dan and I camped and hiked also many times before but we had never carried our own gear and food .  Thus I suggested to do it this time at Torres Del Paine so that it would become our new experience.  In order to save our time once we arrive there, we shopped most of our food for our 4 day hiking trip in Portland before we left. We bought more bread, deli meat, and lettute later once we arrived in Chile. We tried to pack as light as possible.

After more than 48 hours including two nights sleeping at the cold airport in LA and Santiago, Chile, we eventually got to Puerto Natales around 10.30 p.m where we will depart to Torres Del Paine the next morning. Most of stores and restaurants in this mountain town were closed. We got lucky to find a convinient store where we could buy food we needed Phewwww!!!!

 The trek we did there was the "W", one of the most popular routes in South America.

The lonely planet book recommends from East to West but we decided to do the opposite, from West to East. Our main reasoning for this is that we we wanted to do glacier trekking at Gracier Grey in the second day. I would risk no chance of missing it.

Day 1:
After 6 hours of sleep, we took the early morning bus at 7.30am from Puerto Natales to Torres Del Paine.

Afterwards, we got off the bus at PUDETO and took the RIDICULOUSLY EXPENSIVE 30 minute boat (that cost us $36/ride/one person) across Lago Pehoe to get to Lodge Paine Grande where we started hiking at 1.30p.m. 

The first day went by with gloomy weather. It helped our hike . However the downside of it was that the blue color of the lakes along the hike did not stand out.

Somehow my shoulder already started hurting after some first kilometers. When we got to the place where we could have an overlook of the glacier, the wind started being very strong. For the first time in my life, I felt so fortunate to carry a heavy backpack because it reassured my confidence that the wind could not blow me away

During the hike, we passed by black and dead trees resulted from a fire in the forest a couple of years ago

After 5 hours of hiking, we made it to Refugio Grey camp site at around 6p.m, unloaded, set up our tent, and cooked our dinner (including instant noodles, canned salmon, and some fresh lettude).

We also walked to Big Foot Base Capm where we registed for the glacier trekking tour in the next morning. The first day went by quite peacefully and we quickly fell into sleep to get ready for the second day that is supposed to be a long day with about 13 hours of hiking.

Day 2:

We got up at 6a.m to prepare our breakfast and then quickly grabbed our stuff for our glacier trekking trip that started at 7:30a.m.

When we got to the office of Big Foot Base Camp, they told us that they have to push the trip back to 9a.m because the boat from Puerto Natales was broken. Dan and i first did not have any problem. 

However things did not go as it was supposed to be. About 15 minutes later, the manager of the tour told us that they might have to cancel the trip because the boat leaving from Puerto Natales is still broken. I started raising my doubt because I clearly remembered that the manager told us that we picked up the passengers on the cruise to join us instead of using their boat. 

I told Dan about my doubt about something fishy going on here rather than the fact of the broken cruise. Then I asked him to carefully overhear their conversation in Spanish. Unfortunately people there were not aware that Dan could understand Spanish so that they started loudly talking about their problem. It turned out that they wanted to combine Dan and I with another group on the cruise. However the cruise was canceled so that the trip with the people on the cruise might have been canceled. They thought it was not worth of taking only two people to the glacier. 

After Dan's translation, I could feel my face started getting hot. However we tried to stay silent to see what they wanted to do. As expected, the manager came to tell us that they have to cancel our trip because of "technical" problem. After my series of questions about their "technical problem", the guys there still indirectly refered to technical problems with the boat from Puerto Natales. Their lie hit the boiling point and I started yelling at their face for not treating their customer right. I barely yell at anyone but when I do, I really do it. After a long argument, I told them that if they want to cancel our trip, they will have to pay us cancelation fees. To that point, they agreed to take us to the the glacier. Damn it. If it was not the only company that operated the trip, I would never do the tour with them.

After a rocky start with the company, at 8a.m we eventually left for our glacier trek. Their boat picked us up and dropped us at the bottom of the mountain where we hiked up to get close to the glacier. On the positive side, at least we got an awesome tour guide who shared with us a lot about Chile and Rock climbing. He recently started working for the company.

The glacier came into view from our boat. The glacier is estimated to have the length of 28 kilometers and a total area of 270 square kilometers, starting in the Patagonian Andes Mountains to the west and terminate into Grey lake, what we are seeing. It owns a striking blue coloration caused by the absorption of both red and yellow light and leaving light at the blue end of the visibal light spectrum. 

After almost 1 hour hiking up, we got close to the glacier where we strapped crampons onto our shoes, put the helmet on, and started hiking into glacier

 The site really became more amazing when we walked on it, saw, and felt its solid texture. 

We were completely blown away by its unique blue beauty. We did get some meltwater there to drink. 

Those holes in the glacier are the results of trapped rocks that absorb sunlight, melting ice around it.

Ice crystals inside glacier water

I was trying to walk down to a little stream in the glacier with the aid of our tour guide who held me with him through a rope

We lost ourself in the glacier for about 4 hours. I tried to run with crampons on to see how it felt. 

On the way down

Glacier is lying down on the top of the mountain

On the way back, we were randomly "visisted" by a "dude" who is seperate from his "big mama" and freely floating on the lake

 We got back to the Big Foot Camp Base around 3p.m. Couldnot believe that 8 hours flied by so fast. The tour was overpriced but it was totally worth it. Glacier trekking became no doubt one of the highlights of our trip.

However our joy was quickly gloomed by our 8 hour hiking ahead. At the Big Foot Base Camp,I still kept my very cold face to the manager till he officially apolosized us for what they did in the morning. Given our awesome tour guide, I accepted his apology, gave him a big smile, and then we quickly headed out to our next campt site.

I tried to capture the last view of the glacier before we were back on our trek

on the way back to Lodge Paine Grande

The trekking quickly became much more streneous and exhausting than we expected. My shoulder hurt and blisters appeared all over on my feet. Having blisters while running or hiking is one of my worst feelings. Every step I put down, the pain was expanding to my brain. Dan was not in a better situation. later after 7p.m, the weather stopped favoring us with strong wind and rain. We did not have any alternative option. We had to make it to the next campsite by all means despite how much tired we were . Knowing that but there were many moments, all what I wanted was just to lay down on the road and forget about our hike. We stopped many times because my painful feet and Dan's back.

I thought of what Erik WeiHenmayer, a blind guy who succesfully climbed Everest, said " Some limits were real but many more limits were conceived and imposed in my mind and there was a torturous beauty in crossing them."  Then I thought how I tried hard to push myself to finish the marathon 2 weeks ago with all blisters on my toes. I thought of pure happiness once we push through the pain. I felt energized again. I tried to hupnotize myself onto each of my step instead of thinking of pain and giving up. I tried to encourage Dan that if a blind guy could climb Everest, we should be able to make it at least to the next camp site.

The strong wind and rain kept us company for almost 2 hours. Those hours, in no way, could be describd as fun. Instead, it was miserable for us but we knew that it would make our honeymoon memorable for the rest of our life and the beauty of us getting over our limit.

I eventually found some tree branches that could be served as our hiking sticks. I banged the stick to the ground strongly at each of my steps to release my frustration, madness, and exhaust.  I barely curse in both English and Vietnamese. However at that time, I kept cursing whenever I banged the stick to the ground. Actually it did help me a lot to escape my pain. Little by little, my mind was floating with the sound the stick made on the ground instead of thinking of my pain. Dan also later told me that the sound from my stick helped him too.  He moved his legs according to the sound from my stick and tried not to think of exhaust and pain.

 I had no doubt that Dan felt worse than I did. Dan can beat me at a high-intensity workout but I can beat him at endurance. Also I still had endurance from training for the marathon.

We reached our camptsite at 9:45 p.m, 10 minutes before darkness came. 14 hour hiking that day. My tears almost came out when I saw the camp site. We kissed each other for the huge effort we made.

We quickly set up our tent on the last light of the day. We were so exhausted that we could not afford to put our shoes on to eat outside. We made sandwiches with salami and lettude inside our tent, finished our meal in 5 minutes, and quickly collapsed into our sleeping bag without brushing our teeth or washing our hands. so gross, I know :|

Darkness covered us. Mountains were silent. Only the wind was whispering with the trees. We passed out the second we laid down. My entire body was whining. We were more exhausted than we had ever been but I was happy that we pushed it through the pain to make it.

Continued....

a season in which every leaf becomes a beautiful flower

Houston is in the middle of a hot and humid summer right now.  There are sometimes some scattered showers but they cannot beat the heat and humidity.  However, today was such a surprisingly pleasant day with a cooler weather. I woke up early in the morning, savoring each sip of my homemade chai latte tea while enjoying fresh and cool air and listening to birds singing aloud on the balcony before deciding to head  out for a very easy morning run in Hermann park and Rice trail.  This kind of weather makes me reminisce about the fall.

 Among four seasons, Spring and Fall are my favorites.  The transition from winter to spring, signaled by abundant growth and flower blossom, brings new birth and hopes.  Spring triggers the thought that life is going to be beautiful again no matter how cruel winter is. In the contrary, the transition from summer to fall seems to bring life close to the end when winter comes. The heralds of the fall are when weather starts getting cooler and drier and the days grow shorter.  Close to the end of the fall or at mid-fall, leaves start changing its color from green to red, yellow, brown.  All leaves become vividly colorful in full splendor as though they were singing the last life song before they fall off the trees to prepare for a long winter's rest.

Those photos were taken during my trip to Arkansas to see foliage
Though leaves might be sent off to the ground after their life last song, their song will live forever as long as we hold it in our memory

"I will still be thereAs long as you hold mein your own memoryRemember 
When your dreams have endedTime can be transcendedJust remember me
I am the one star that keeps burningSo brightlyIt is the last lightTo fade into the rising sun"

"It's not a sprint, it's a marathon"

My philosophy in life is to follow my passion. I believe, if we love what we do, and we try it very hard and wisely, we’ll be successful.  Money shouldn’t matter.  Money will come.  I didn’t come from a rich family, but I know that I am not going to stay hungry or have to beg anyone for money/food one day given my education.  Many moments in my life I felt that everything seemed to fall apart, but faith in what I did always brought me hope.  Hope that something better was right around the corner.  And, I was never wrong.  My effort and hard work had always paid off, that is until last year when I started losing my passion for what I have done.  Everything happened like a dream. Just like one day you woke up, and you felt like you fell down into a bottomless dark canyon.  Darkness covers you.  I hit rock bottom for the first time.

Running is a great outlet for me when I think I’m losing my passion.  Running is my most favorite sport.  Dan introduced me to running almost 3 years ago.  I remember during my first run, I sprinted very fast for 5 minutes, then stopped and could not breathe. It took me many months to finish 3 miles without a stop given the absence of my stamina and endurance.  

One day Dan and Rob decided to do a 10K run.  Dan told me about the race only a couple of weeks before the race.  I was a little annoyed because he didn’t ask if I wanted to join them.  I don’t think he was being mean, but you would probably do the same if you were him.At that point, I could barely finish a 3 mile run without many stops and walking. Thus forget about 10k (~ 6mile).

When I asked Dan why he did not invite me to join them, he gave me the answer exactly as what I anticipated. He told me that I cannot do the 10K because I could not run even 3 miles.  Fair enough.  However, what he said triggered my winning attitude. I decided to participate into the race despite Dan’s warning about the possible injury I might have.  I thought it would be a good challenge for me to do what others think is impossible for me.  I got 2.5 weeks left for training.

I entered the race with the thought that I might have walked 2/3 of the race.  Dan even told me that it was OK for me to walk the whole race if I was tired and I should not try to catch up with them.  He ran with me for the first mile and then he started speeding up with Rob.  I tried to forget the fact that many people kept passing me.  I solely stayed focus on my own pace. I finished mile 1 without stopping.  Woohoo!  After mile 2, I still kept running.  Beyond my expectation!  Then the 3rd mile without stopping.  I was startled.  At mile 4, I started feeling my heavy breath and my leg muscles began tingle and tired.  So I started walking.  But 15 seconds later I managed to run again.  I used an old guy a few feet ahead of me as my imaginary competitor and motivator.  People still kept passing me, though I did pass a very few peopleJ . Whenever I was exhausted and started walking, I looked up at my imaginary competitor and kept telling myself that I am younger than he is and I should be able to keep running if he can do it. Then my adrenaline was high again.  When I hit the last mile, I was completely fatigued.  The sun became very strong.  I felt dehydrated and dizzy.  I still competed with the old guy. I think he knew that we were competing with each other because we kept taking turns to pass each other.  All of a sudden, I was near the finish line, and I could see Dan standing at the finish line with his eyes wide open as he saw me approach. I ended up finishing the race 7 minutes later than Dan and Rob!  Though I almost collapsed at the finish line, I still felt really good with the result.  It was not about the time of my run.  It was because I beat my own expectations.  I beat the little voice in my head telling me to quit sometimes during the race.  I did walk, but I didn't stop, and I finished what I started.

1.5 years later, Vanessa and I were talking about the 2011 Austin-half marathon during a random conversation.  I thought it would be a good chance for me to level up my running.  At that time, I could do 3 miles without stopping.  No more than that.  Dan was cautious again about a long run for me because from his own experience, he  badly injured his IT band during his pursuit of the Chicago marathon in 2008, which he still hasn’t fully recovered from.  But, as usual, Dan supported my decision, and he did not forget to warn me about the race.  I entered my training with excitement, fear, and faith by using a schedule found on the website of runner’s world.  Unlike the 10K, I was better prepared for the race.  Before the race, I ran 9 miles once, though my endurance was a little bit inconsistent. 

The day before the race, Dan warned me about some big hills at the end.  He wanted to take me to see the running course so that I knew what I had to go through during the run.  However I decided not to do it because I wanted to keep it as a surprise.  I also tried not to fathom how I could finish a 13 mile run given my inconsistent endurance.  

When I got to the race, many runners covered the area already.  However something happened to me 15 minutes before the race started.  Something went wrong with my stomach.  Crap.  I could not remember what I ate the day before.  I ran to find a bathroom.  There were long lines at every single mobile bathroom.  I started being hectic. I cannot quit even before the race starts.  Eventually, I could manage to make it back to the start line only a few minutes before the race started.  Phew.

The Austin-half marathon ended up being a great half-marathon, with a lot of people cheering along the street, music at every corner, children going down the street to hi-five the runners, and beer offered sometimes.  All that exciting stuff distracted me from my tired legs and heavy breath and  I enjoyed every single moment during the run.  There were some moments I was completely exhausted mentally and physically, but I used my mental power to keep myself moving forward.  Eventually I saw and approached the finish line with the result that did not disappoint me.  My time was not too bad but it’s not what I really cared for.  I was very happy to beat my expectations and to finish what I started. 

I have already overcome the darkest days of my life when I felt completely directionless and powerless.  I have already overcome days when I freaked out and felt empty every morning when I woke up. I read an article saying that your brain cannot distinguish the real and the imaged (http://bigthink.com/experts-corner/how-to-rewire-your-brain-for-success).  If you keep faking your feeling, one day it becomes true.  Every morning I tell myself that today is going be a good day and I feel better.  I keep smiling at everyone every day, enjoying other moments of my life, and keep running.  I’ve learned how to stay balanced and positive, how to start standing up again, and other life skills along the way. I still keep tirelessly searching in all directions to find a way out the dark canyon.  

I started this note by saying to follow your passion, but to be honest, I have yet to find my passion since I lost it.  Some lost is meant to be found and some is not meant to be found.  Passion is always meant to be found for me. There are many moments I clench my teeth or let tears continuously roll on my cheeks when flashbacks of my energy and passion in the past suddenly came back.  However, I am starting to gain an interest in several things in my career, and I keep my hope that there is always a light at the end of the tunnel.  The passion is gone, but I will find it all again surely one day if I don’t give up. And I am never taught to give it up.  I have a faith in rebirth!

 "Believe that you can run farther or faster. Believe that you're young enough, old enough, strong enough, and so on to accomplish everything you want to do. Don't let worn-out beliefs stop you from moving beyond yourself."
-John Bingham, running speaker and writer