Note: This picture was taken by me at the Craters of Moon National Park in Idaho. This plant is among a few kinds of plants that can survive in the lava field
One night, I randomly looked at the YM status of my close friend “I’m basically OK”. I joked with her that why it’s just “OK” not “advanced”. She did not say much but I could feel her tiredness and the burdens she is carrying on her shoulder. I could feel her effort to keep her life going. She told me that she admires me for my perseverance and adaption to a new environment.
Another night, I randomly read the most recent writing of my good friend that describes her feeling about life since she got back to Vietnam. She sometimes loses her interest in what she is doing. Her dream is sometimes shaky because of what she is witnessing and going through in the Vietnamese society. She chooses to be apathetic about life in order to have a peaceful state of mind. I don’t want to make any comments about her decision but I do miss her enthusiasm, youthful spirit, and energy when I first met her in New York.
Those friends make me think back to my former boss who has had a significant influence on my outlook on life. My former boss grew up in a high class family in Vietnam. When she was young, there were many guys who asked her out for a date. Finally she chose one she wanted to date. After dating for a while, her boyfriend, who is her husband now, took her to visit his family in the country side. She said that he took her to a very wide field. She looked around and saw no houses anywhere; so, she asked her boyfriend where his house was. After he pointed at his house for her, she was almost in shock. She couldn’t believe in her eyes what was called a house. The house was built by soil so it looked like a pile of soil in the middle of nowhere.
Despite the situation of his family, she chose him over other rich guys. After her marriage, she did not really receive support from her family. Her husband and she had to start her own life from nothing. All what they had was love and support to each other. Her husband and she managed to build their first own house themselves. Currently, they are happy and wealthy. She has two children to whom she is very close. Her children confide to her their most intimate moments in their lives from dating stories with different girls to everything else. She lives with her mother-in-law who even likes her more than her own son. She is always a great example of people who know how to choose to stay happy and positive. Although she went through a lot of changes in her life, she never regrets anything she’s chosen and never feels that she is a desperate person in this world.
Speaking of career, my boss is a prominent figure in Public Health in Vietnam. She got her Master’s at London school, one of the best Public Health Universities in the world. During her life, she chose to never stop fighting for her career though at some points, she might have taken a break for family matters. She took a stand for reproductive rights for Vietnamese women and raised awareness on the issue at the international population conference. After many years persistently fighting for the cause, reproductive rights for Vietnamese have improved immensely.
My friends make me think of my father who implicitly teaches me how to persevere in this life. My dad comes from one of the poorest families in my village. He was the only person who could go to school in his family. He had to manage by himself to survive during his college years with a little financial help from his family. I should say that it’s not that his family did not want to support him but that they didn’t have much to offer. Despite a lot of difficulties, my dad graduated from college with an excellent degree. After years working, he wanted to do a PhD abroad. It should be noted that in the past, in Vietnam, there were not many scholarships for a person who wanted to study abroad in the past in Vietnam. If anyone wanted to go abroad, he/she had to pass an exam given by the government. Normally people who wanted to take the exam took some classes to get prepared for it. Because my dad couldn’t financially support those classes, he prepared for the exam by himself. At the exam, my dad ran into his former teacher who was also attending the exam. The teacher looked at my dad with and asked what my dad was doing there. My dad said that he came here to take the exam. The teacher said that my dad should go home because he would fail for sure. Man, what a bad teacher. My Dad said, “We’ll see.” The ending of this story was that my dad went abroad while the teacher stayed in Vietnam. During his time abroad, he chose to talk with little kids in Bulgaria to improve his language because no one there was available to help him out. He was fluent at Bulgrarian finally.
Despite the situation of his family, she chose him over other rich guys. After her marriage, she did not really receive support from her family. Her husband and she had to start her own life from nothing. All what they had was love and support to each other. Her husband and she managed to build their first own house themselves. Currently, they are happy and wealthy. She has two children to whom she is very close. Her children confide to her their most intimate moments in their lives from dating stories with different girls to everything else. She lives with her mother-in-law who even likes her more than her own son. She is always a great example of people who know how to choose to stay happy and positive. Although she went through a lot of changes in her life, she never regrets anything she’s chosen and never feels that she is a desperate person in this world.
Speaking of career, my boss is a prominent figure in Public Health in Vietnam. She got her Master’s at London school, one of the best Public Health Universities in the world. During her life, she chose to never stop fighting for her career though at some points, she might have taken a break for family matters. She took a stand for reproductive rights for Vietnamese women and raised awareness on the issue at the international population conference. After many years persistently fighting for the cause, reproductive rights for Vietnamese have improved immensely.
My friends make me think of my father who implicitly teaches me how to persevere in this life. My dad comes from one of the poorest families in my village. He was the only person who could go to school in his family. He had to manage by himself to survive during his college years with a little financial help from his family. I should say that it’s not that his family did not want to support him but that they didn’t have much to offer. Despite a lot of difficulties, my dad graduated from college with an excellent degree. After years working, he wanted to do a PhD abroad. It should be noted that in the past, in Vietnam, there were not many scholarships for a person who wanted to study abroad in the past in Vietnam. If anyone wanted to go abroad, he/she had to pass an exam given by the government. Normally people who wanted to take the exam took some classes to get prepared for it. Because my dad couldn’t financially support those classes, he prepared for the exam by himself. At the exam, my dad ran into his former teacher who was also attending the exam. The teacher looked at my dad with and asked what my dad was doing there. My dad said that he came here to take the exam. The teacher said that my dad should go home because he would fail for sure. Man, what a bad teacher. My Dad said, “We’ll see.” The ending of this story was that my dad went abroad while the teacher stayed in Vietnam. During his time abroad, he chose to talk with little kids in Bulgaria to improve his language because no one there was available to help him out. He was fluent at Bulgrarian finally.
After my dad finished his PhD, he returned to Vietnam to do research in Vietnam. In that time in Vietnam, research materials in his field were very scarce. Also, those materials were mainly in foreign languages such as Chinese, etc. However, language barriers did not stop his passion for research. He taught himself different languages so that he could understand those materials. My dad is always a great example of people who chose to never stop following their dreams. He always inspires me to live my own dreams by telling me his life stories. Whenever I lose my strength, thinking of what he’s done in his life always pushes me up. I believe that there is always at least a path for me to follow in this life. Also, I believe that whenever one door closes on me, another door will open up for me somewhere else. The more I grow up, the more deeply I recognize that I’m never allowed to choose to give up my dream. I can fall down on the way to make my dream come true but I have to learn how to stand up to continue following it.
My friends make me think of Dr.Beasley Palmer, a director of my program and a developer of the Hepatitis B vaccine that is given to every baby now. After discovering the link between cancer and the hepatitis B virus, he went to the WHO to talk about the possibility of requiring every baby to be vaccinated for hepatitis B. In the beginning, no one in the WHO wanted to hear his story even though he demonstrated his scientific evidence. He did not give it up. He went everywhere to talk to everyone who he thought could possibly be of some help. He tirelessly collected effort from everyone to convince the WHO. Now hepatitis vaccine B is given to all born babies worldwide. His effort saved millions of people in the world. What would have happened if he had given up his dream? What would have happened if he had chosen not to persevere in his dream?
Those thoughts make me deeply think that life is our choice. When we face difficulties, we choose to fight for what we want or just stay in the corner crying out about an unlucky life and wishing for luck. When we fall down, we choose to stand up and keep living our dream or just lay down there and let our dream die out. It’s our choice to value each moment of life and live to the fullest or let everything go to waste. We choose to stay open-minded to new things or close ourselves to everything. It’s our choice to stay positive or negative when everything does not turn out the way we expected. It’s our choice to give our big heart to everyone and receive another big heart or let our heart live alone forever. It’s our choice to learn how to forgive to have a peaceful mind or live our life with anger and revenge.
I do believe that there’s no such thing as destiny. Life is a choice. If we want to have anything, we have to go out and fight for it. People blame the context but if we don’t do anything to improve our context, when can it become better? I’m not an experienced person in this life but I do think that life has its ups and downs. It’s our choice to keep it up whenever it has its downs for the rest of our lives.
I dedicate my writing to all my beloved people and myself too. I hope that my significant people choose to stay happy and positive in their lives. Also, I hope that whenever my life is down, reading this post will remind me of dreams I choose to followJ
